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| We've all been here... |
You have survived fresher’s week. You have been forced into mixing with a bunch of strangers, getting drunk with them in order to numb the awkwardness of them being strangers and now everyone’s your new best friend for life. Your light Facebook stalking has probably gone into overdrive and as a result your Facebook friends list has sky rocketed. Result.
But everyone now also knows that you got so drunk that on the 1st night out you offended your new flatmates, passionately cavorted with someone who might have been Muammar Gaddafi's twin brother, thrown up, passed out and soiled your own bed sheets. Relax we’ve all been there.
But for future reference here are some pointers to avoid the pitfalls of ruining your life in the 1st year of Uni and remaining semi alive.
Money
Vintage stores are not as cheep as they used to be. You need a bike because the cost of weekly tubes is the same as that of a mortgage. So you need a job, so get a job , send out CV's to every bar and shop in London , go to jobs fair, check the UAL careers website. It’s very good. For smokers, say hello to roll ups.
If your skint don’t resort to shoplifting, you will most likely just get caught and it could ruin your chances of a career. If your shoplifting and your not skint then your either greedy or have got adrenalin rush issues so you probably wont even be reading this as you’ll be to busy having sex with a stranger on the Northern line.
Don’t get involved in the sex trade. Yeh I know before you say it, "a bitch got bills to pay! “ I hear ya! But honestly speaking from experience the pension plans always terrible and it will only make whatever low self esteem issues you clearly already have even worse. No judgements though.
Don’t spend your student loan at the Apple store. Unless your major depressed, then go ahead, you’re worth it. Who cares?
There is a lot of cool free stuff that happens, check the UAL website and save your money for important things like morning after pills and dry shampoo. Pay rent and Uni fees on time, they will chase you like Taliban insurgents until you do pay.
Some will feel homesick, they will miss the family Labrador and the thought of not seeing him till Christmas is simply out of the question. In emergencies like these there’s Megabus. They are the cheapest method of transport. If you book earlier enough you can travel 1 way for £1.
Health
The lemon in your tequila doesn’t count towards your 5 a day.
After the constant partying, you will be looking rough, pale, bloated or malnourished. Try and eat healthy, stick to the boring stuff like fruit and veg.
Join a gym, one of the cheapest is Pure Gyms, there is no joining fee, it’s roughly £20 per month and open 24hrs. Or there are many parks in London, jog round them. Sweat out the toxins for free. You don’t have to keep up with everyone with regards to alcohol consumption. No one bows to peer pressure anymore, it’s so lame.
Safe sex is not for wimps. It’s for people who at the moment don’t want kids or genital warts. You have the rest of your lives to enjoy these things. You will get free condoms, use them. Avoid people who blow them up and put them over there face, this kind of behaviour by students is a massive social faux pas and is only really done by the lectures in their staff room. Trust me, IV seen it.
Living In Harmony
Avoid anyone who brought cuddly toys from home with them or anyone who brought weapons from home with them. Both will just turn out to be attention seekers. Trust me. It may seem petty to set up a rota in your flat, unnecessary even, there’s no need, everyone will do it anyway and recycling is a massive priority.
Wrong, they wont, you wont and if your the type of person that will you will probably have a breakdown at some point and if your the person that doesn’t, then your disgusting and shortly people wont enter your flat without a tetanus.
This will create a bad atmosphere which will turn into stress and distract you from your studies, you and your flatmates will all end up hating each other and the world will explode due to you neglecting your recycling duties.
Peers
Not everyone is a people person, some people work best alone and that’s cool as well if that’s want they want. There’s people who have lives outside Uni and are here to learn not meet soul mates. Make an effort with people but don’t pester them. Restraining orders in the name of friendship are not cool. There scary. I’m in my second year now and I no one likes or speaks to me yet. Even my tutors and lectures have all at some point spat on me. It’s made me stronger.
Of course then there’s the other people who go and make friends and skip to class together hand in hand in joyous friendship after knowing each other for 2 mins. They people are annoying. Avoid them.
Getting Involved
Some people love to protest for good causes. You will find these people in uni, your probably already dying to protest and march for a cause. Rest assure there will be someone here at UAL happy to get you marching for something, and we make the best banners, fact.
However , don’t be throwing fire extinguishers off roofs, deface war monuments or chucking paint at Charles and Camilla, as not only is that unacceptable and illegal , its also already been done , and we here at UAL pride ourselves on originality.
Getting The Most Out Of Uni
Go to class and Have fun but put the hard work in because one way or another you’re paying for this
new Uni life. It will be over in a flash and it would be nice to have a degree to show for it and not just foggy memories, unattractive tattoos and debt.
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